Bezman's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[A Stop Motion Story]

Don't describe your own stuff as cool...

I mean, the way you say it, you're putting it forward as fact rather than opinion and that makes you seem like a bit of a dick.

The movie itself does look as if it took a wee bit of effort, bit not enough thought went into the jokes or 'plot'.

None of it was even mildly amusing.

I suggest you keep at it, maybe using something you can manipulate a bit more for next time. Try using clay maybe? Or at least more posable action figures. That way, you'll be able to make them look more alive and the whole thing will be more interesting to watch.

Also, I suggest you download the NG pre-loader and stick it at the start of your movie since as it is, it started playing for me and then stopped half-way through the first scene. I'd much rather wait a minute at the start than have it stall whilst playing.

Not bad for a first attempt I suppose.

[MDM - Tenchi]

Good, but could be better.

As well as peach being in view for the whole of the ending (part of her sprite being left on-screen), which has already been mentioned, there's a couple of other things I'd complain about.

The ending song, whilst excellent, makes the filesize far too big due to the fact that it continue for its whole length after the movie finishes. If you had a loop for the ending, it would be a bit better.

If you restart the movie, the ending music still plays, fucking it up a bit. Sort this out by having a stopAllSounds(); command on the first frame of the movie, before the music starts.

At some points, Mario seemed to stay still for a bit longer than he maybe should have to make it interesting. Same goes for Sonic - would have been better if he had been dancing faster without pausing every so often.

Lastly, the whole joke that lies in the centre just isn't that great. Peach rejects a gift and Mario kicks her? Not the best joke.

However, I did really like the ending joke and you have manipulated the sprites rather well.

Also, I liked the fact that you made some effort to synch motions and text to the music.

I suggest you keep at it, as you obviously have some potential in you.

Stay fizzy,
Bez

tenchi5000 responds:

Thanks for the comments. Finnaly someone with Constructive comments. The fags were really startin to piss me off with the flaming

[Lord Of The Pigs Trailer]

I didn't laugh at all when I saw it first,...

but watching it this 2nd time, I let out a couple of chuckles.

However, I don't think that makes it worth watching. Sorry.

I feel the voices throughout are a bit too quiet and the music - when it exists - drowns them out a bit.

Also, why is there only music right at the start and end?

It seems that some love this, so well done. I found it amusing for a few seconds, but I suppose it's just not my kind of humour.

Having said that, I laughed really hard a while ago when a friend dubbed an advert on TV... Hmmm...

Maybe if you tried to form some sort of shitty story it'd be funnier?

[Blob Wars]

Not bad at all for your first attempt.

It's not exactly original, but at least you've made something. :)

I suggest you make the movements a bit faster. If you do that, this could be rather fun to watch.

Other than that, just keep at it and you'll undoubtedly keep improving. :)

Stay funky,
Bez

[Stunner List]

Interesting concept...

Well, you've picked the victims well (I look forward to the full working list!) and the animation's good enough to make this mildly entertaining.

One problem is that with Bush, it asks you if you want to do it or not. If you select no, it says 'WHAT?' and then just goes to the same bit as if you'd said yes. It might have been better if it'd at least made some sort of sense. Like if he asked you again, or maybe said 'to hell with you! I'm doing it anyway!'.

Anyway, it's a decent thing. Not the best, and it could well get a bit boring I suppose (maybe try to think of some additional jokes or something for the remaining folk?) but it's well presented.

As the previous guy said, some voices could make this awesome. I could see myself cracking up if you had some actual voices for all the victims, with them screaming or whatever as they suffer at the hands of Stone 'Gold'.

Good luck finishing it. :)

DrPlaid responds:

Thanks for that fantastic review. You all are right. (Except for the guy that said Stone Cold sucks. Since Im so busy I never have time to dedicate to my love of animation. I can get much better and reviews like these will help me in that goal. NewGrounds is the shit!!

[The Ten Commandments]

Seems good, but needs subtitles.

I think I understand the message you're trying to get across and I smiled at some of the stuff said.

However, I didn't make out what was said at the start of the movie, don't understand what the setting is (I'm not American, so don't hear all your news) and that detracted severely from my enjoyment of the movie.

If you redid this with subtitles and also had a paused screen at the start explaining the background (or maybe an option to either just watch the movie or go to such a screen), then I'd probably enjoy it far more.

Do you think you'll ever make such a thing? I mean you re-did the Bush Bash thing with clocks...

TheOtherTruth responds:

Thank you for your review.

Scotland, eh? First of all, we need some quality Scottish Ale to discuss this over!!

First of all, this nutty supreme court justice in Alabama believes that the ten commandments are the basis for our legal system. More importantly, he believes that everybody else should agree with this premise.

Because he felt this way, he sneaked a 4000 pound (1800 kilo?) monument into the courthouse and planted it in a very conspicuous place.

NOW, I am happy that this man is good with his religion, and that he is a God fearing man.

My problem with this is several fold.

First he believes that the only way to be moral is to believe in the ten commandments. I would wager that there are many moral people who believe in other religions, or even atheists, who are moral and don't adhere to the judge's beliefs.

Second. In the United States we are supposed to have a separation of church and state. By putting his personal beliefs in the lobby of the courthouse he violates this basic concept in our law, and also suggests a complete bias against those who do not follow his beliefs.

Third, I believe that even having a monument like this, and then fighting vigorously to keep it in place is actually idol worship. This is against the 2nd commandment!

and finally....

HE HAD TO SNEAK IT IN THE COURTHOUSE AT NIGHT!!!!!

Now, I don't know where you come from but if you have to "SNEAK" to do something....ITS PROBABLY WRONG!!!

So, this is basically the gist of the movie. This guy overstepped his bounds, the religious right flocked to him like insects to an insect zapper to protect a stone (of all things), and anybody who disagreed was a heathen!

I hope that helps some.

OH YEAH, the clock thing was just an experiment.

I wanted to see if you submitted 2 things (basically the same) one with clocks and one without, would people rate the movie differently.

The results: It got exactly the same rating! So, I am not convinced that just putting a clock in a movie changes the world!

[Death-Duel No.2]

I liked the whirlwind thing...

The problem with swords fighting each other is that it's hard to follow when/if damage is being dealt. The normal swords hit the hilts a few times - the most obvious vulnerable point surely - and nothing happened.

I suppose it'd be more interesting with characters but to be honest, I suggest you try something completely different, as I have a feeling that having characters fight, Soul Calibur style, would be too hard for you to pull off.

I mean your art here is pretty decent, but I think the animation may be a bit too tricky for you and if it's just a pure fight scene, then you'll have to make the graphics and choreography damn good for it to be entertaining.

Maybe you could make it a sort of adventure series about a boy who learns to manipulate light objects through telekinesis and then goes off, wielding this sword using only his mind and trying to defeat... the evil ruler of the kingdom?

Then he could meet other folk who manipulate different swords.

Oh, and it should be part of the plot that maybe to move things they first need to undergo a ritual to become mentally connected? That could sort out plot problems of why they don't just manipulate the other person's sword.

I think that could be a funky storyline. If you think it has potential, then make it, as I'd rather like to see that...

Cypher responds:

It's a cool idea. It might take a while to make. I might revise that idea. Or get more animation skills before I even attempt it.

Thanks for the review..I'm basically still learning the next step of Flash..character animation.

Thanks. :D

[Kill the family]

Me like. :)

As you said so rightly, it's short, but it's also sweet and to the point. The beginnings of a chuckle escaped my lips despite the joke being nothing original.

I suppose I just liked the presentation.

The graphics were of a nice style and I liked the colours you selected.

I liked the way the movie started off sweet and degenerated into violence.

I liked the sound loop. Whilst a bit annoying after watching the movie 3 times, it fits the mood perfectly and the sound effects were also great.

I suppose you could say I liked this. :)

Stay funky,
Bez

Holmen responds:

you know what? I have realized one thing today. This is a very long review right? OkeY, I thougt maybe I should respond to it, then I thought "no I will not respond to that review". -But i did.
Sooo, yeah, thanks.

[Teh Blobzor 1]

Not too interesting, but nicely done.

To be honest, the movie itself isn't that interesting - there's no real story, the only joke I could see (the guy blowing off his own head) was poor, the whole super-saiyan-mafioso thing didn't really work for me and to top it off, the sound loop was too short.

Also, as previously mentioned, the loop with teh blobzor running away near the start is far too long.

However, the loop does fit well and I only noticed the short length on my 2nd viewing. I liked your drawings and animation - I'd have been moderately pleased if I'd made this... which is kinda embarrassing considering I'm so much older than you...

I suggest that for the next movie you think a little more about the plot and maybe try to make the movie about an actual wacky adventure so it can live up to your claims?

Overall, it's not a great movie but you really should be proud of it all - specially the animation. Considering your age, I'm sure that you'll be able to make professional looking stuff after a few years as long as you stick with it.

Looking forward to more stuff from you,
Bez

[Hell On Earth- Episode 1]

Great work! But the sound quality could be better.

The sound could be a little clearer and it grates during the 'hell on earth' tune.

However, the voices themselves are smashing, as are the graphics.

The plot isn't quite to my taste, but even I can't help but smile during the duration of this animation.

Overall, a quality piece of work.